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| Monday morning decompression at the Jam Coffeeshop |
I am starting to use my blog again (!!!!!) and am inviting others into the journey as I write. I came across this prayer that I wrote last year and thought I would begin by sharing it today...Starting with Psalm 23
YOU are my shepherd, so I will not want for anything.
YOU make me lie down in green pastures.
YOU lead me beside the still waters.
YOU restore my soul.
YOU lead me in paths of righteousness for YOUR name!
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will NOT fear evil, for YOU are with me!
Your rod and your staff, the comfort me.
YOU prepare a table laid out in front of me In the presence of my enemies;
YOU anoint my head with oil;
MY CUP OVERFLOWS!
Surely GOODNESS and MERCY will follow me ALL THE DAYS OF MY LIFE
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord FOREVER!
Thank you so much, Father, that even when life is hard, it is so incredibly, beyond words GOOD. You have said this to me, and I wasn’t sure if I could believe you, but I believe you now because you have opened my eyes, ripped off the layers in order to pour your healing, which is your very self into me, and you have caused my soul to feel and my spirit to be brought back to life. Thank you that you saw fit to give me new vision, new hope, new insight, new resolve, new peace, new strength and endurance and new inspiration for whatever you have called me to. You are just this good and I really can’t contain it, so now my tears leak out of my face out of sheer gratitude and thankfulness and how amazing you are. I feel like I’m living again, but I’m REALLY living, not just existing as a half-shadow, trapped in my thick glass cage that I could see out of, but was not really living and moving within as I slowly lost the oxygen. I know you’ve known and seen all along, but my heart still marvels…How did you know just what to do to me? How did you know when? How did you know what to speak to my heart? Thank you for this deep, deep life that you have awakened and thank you for being THERE. I don’t want to stop talking to you, communing with you. I know that there will be times when perhaps I feel distant or disconnected again. I know that there will be moments of confusion, but I know where you are and I know where I want you to be. I know when I wake up, where I want to find you- right beside me. When I close my eyes, I want you to be my last conscious thought, and then let me breathe thanks in and out in the night hours. Even if things get hard, be right beside me always. This IS what makes life right. YOU ARE what makes life right- absolutely NOTHING else! What a marvel! Burn up the false life and false self that so easily and readily searches for an opportunity to present itself. Point this out to me and let me not wallow in the shame of it, but rather rejoice in the fact that you have shown this to me in order to keep me free. Thank you that you have made me beautiful and whole and complete, not lacking any good thing. I move to pray for these people all around me- make their souls come on fire, too. Make us yours, Lord. We are only shells without being yours. We walk around as if to say that we own this life and our destiny, all the while so blind to the fact that it’s YOU, YOU, YOU and will always and forever be you- beginning and the end. Jesus, set your spirit- which is your life and heart and love within me, so that wherever I go, it is you going there with me and revealing yourself to the places I go and the people I see and any words that are ever said. I continue to receive this quiet, bold confidence of your place at the deepest part of my heart. Teach me how to articulate your life in me, when you call me to do so. But most importantly, let your fire burning within me begin to set the world on fire.
